So, in the interests of not wasting electronic paper (I don't know how that works either) here is my script that I presented for the G Live read-through recently. An amazing night, lots of talented writers presented their work, and it all went down really well with the audience.
I'm really proud of this piece. I think it's the first thing i've written with clearly defined characters and I feel like i've learnt an important lesson - write clear characters and your story will fly. Enjoy!
The curtains open and
we see a desk with an AIRPORT GUARD behind it. A sign above his head reads
"Check-In Desk". A queue of people are slowly being processed and once
they have, they walk off stage. LUCY bounces up to the back of the queue,
followed moments later by ALAN who stands behind her. She bobs up and down
before turning to face Alan, who is clutching his chest.
LUCY
Oh dear are you ok?
Alan ignores her. He
takes a deep breath and then stands more comfortably. Lucy continues to bob up
and down.
LUCY
So I’m waiting for my boyfriend to
come back. He's just nipped to the loo. His name's Charlie and he's gorgeous!
Alan ignores her
LUCY
My name's Lucy, what's yours?
Alan continues to
ignore her
LUCY
Yeah Charlie’s great though. We're
going to Marbella. Well you know that because so are you! Ha! It's our first
holiday together! Can you believe it? I wanted to...
ALAN
It's ALAN and no, i'm sorry but i'm
really not interested. I just want to stand here quietly if that's ok.
LUCY
Sure no problem. Sorry!
Lucy turns to face
the front again. She tries to contain it but she's clearly excited. Suddenly
she faces Alan again.
LUCY
You see, we never really had the money
before now. Charlie always says I'm a silly billy but I was only sixteen and I
thought charity shops paid people to work there. Trouble is, it only took me a
couple of hours and I was hooked. Charlie wasn't too pleased but he always says
when he saw how happy I was helping other people, he didn't mind. Anyway he was
working at the...
ALAN
I'm sorry but how old are you?
LUCY
I’ll be twenty five in two days’ time.
Charlie says we're going to find a nice restaurant and...
ALAN
Twenty five and you talk like you're a
small child? Honesty listen to yourself
LUCY
I've never really thought about it
like that before. Charlie says...
ALAN
"Charlie says...Charlie
says" Where is your beloved Charlie ay? I think your Charlie’s left you my
dear.
LUCY
Why? Do you think he's ok? Oh god I
hope anything hasn't happened to him on the way to the bathroom. When I first
met him, he had hit his head. Well I say he hit his head, technically 'someone'
hit his head.
ALAN
Why don't you go and see where he is,
if you're so worried and leave me alone
LUCY
You see, Daniel Higgins took my pencil
case and made me cry. It was a Hello Kitty one.
ALAN
Hello Kitty? Again how old are you?
LUCY
Twenty five in two days time. No, see
I was only twelve and Daniel Higgins took it. I cried all the way home and then
just after Newsround finished, there was this knock at the door...
ALAN
Brilliant, honesty i'd just like to
stand here...
LUCY
And it was Charlie. He had seen me cry
and then he went and stood up to this Daniel Higgins. Trouble is, Charlie isn't
the biggest guy. Never has been and Daniel floored him. Thing is...
ALAN
Honesty I...
LUCY
Thing is, Charlie didn't give up
fighting. Daniel eventually gave it to him out of pity. And when he turned up
at my door I...
ALAN
Annoyed him so much that he was forced
to date you?
LUCY
No silly. No when he turned up at my
door I made him a cup of tea. Best cup of tea he ever had he said. And hobnobs!
ALAN
Lucky boy
LUCY
And we haven't really been apart
since. Well I went to uni and he went to a different one but every weekend I
saw him and now here we are. First holiday!
ALAN
Do you make a habit of pestering
strangers?
LUCY
Sometimes. So who are you here with?
ALAN
No-one. Is that ok?
LUCY
I don't know really. Do you think it's
ok?
ALAN
What do you care what I think?
LUCY
I think you're interesting. I feel
like I know you
ALAN
I don't think so.
LUCY
Yeah no I definitely know you. Did you
ever teach at Oak Hill?
ALAN
Nope
LUCY
Hmmmm….
Lucy turns to face
the front and Alan resumes standing there, moping. Suddenly Lucy spins around
LUCY
I KNOW! You were at the same
hospital as me weren't you
ALAN
Was I?
LUCY
Yep I saw you. Hanging about outside
my room. Not in a weird way. Well I don't think so. Anyway that day was
amazing. Not only did I find out that err well whatever it was I had, had gone
into remission, but my dad bought us lunch and we played crazy golf by the
beach. Dad so cheated on the Big Windmill and I...
ALAN
You were at St Andrews?
LUCY
Was I?! Only for like the whole of
last year. Yeah basically test and test and test and test and test and...
ALAN
Test?
LUCY
Yes! And then they did stuff and it
backed off. Typical. As Dad said, nothing can stand up to any Wilson woman that
stands their ground!
ALAN
Wonderful...
LUCY
So where's your wife?
ALAN
She died.
LUCY
Oh i'm sorry.
ALAN
Why? You didn't run her down
LUCY
No but it's what people say isn't it.
That's what people said to me when I got ill. "I'm sorry". Weird
isn't it. How did you meet?
ALAN
We were at the same bus stop and when
it started raining she shared her umbrella with me. Her name was Lucy.
LUCY
Like me?! No way! Aww. She sounds like
me. I like helping other people. Makes you feel good doesn’t it. Do you have
any children?
ALAN
One. A boy. Well man now. Is that
alright?!
LUCY
What's his name?
ALAN
Mark. Why?
LUCY
Just making conversation. You know, to
pass the time.
AIRPORT
GUARD
NEXT!
The queue moves
forward and the two people get processed. Lucy and Alan are next
LUCY
Oh I hope Charlie is ok. Honestly that
boy would lose his head if it wasn't screwed on. Which is weird because i've
never seen any screws on anyone but yet everyone always says that and...
ALAN
Thank god, nearly there
LUCY
So where's Mark then?
ALAN
If I answer will you leave me alone?!
LUCY
Hmmm. Maybe.
ALAN
I don't talk to him.
LUCY
Really? Then how do you tell him his
dinner's ready?
ALAN
He doesn't live with me
LUCY
Oh dear. Why's that then?
ALAN
Is it any of your business?
LUCY
Did he keep annoying you?
ALAN
You could say that. If you want to
know, he nearly bankrupt me
LUCY
Oh dear.......can't have done it that
badly, you're off to Marbella!
ALAN
No but nearly. Him and that stupid
garage of his. You watch one episode of Dragons Den and you think you can run
your own company?! But that’s ok as long as daddy dearest is there to pick up
the bill
LUCY
What do you do?
ALAN
I'm a mechanic.
LUCY
Oh. So he just wanted to be like his
dad then?
ALAN
If he had wanted to be like his dad,
he would have been more sensible with his money. Saved it for a rainy day.
LUCY
Maybe he just wanted to make you
proud?
ALAN
Sorry what is this to do with you
anyway?
LUCY
Nothing but Charlie's taking his time.
This one time when we went to see Mrs Doubtfire he went to get popcorn.
Honestly I swear half the film was over before he returned. Turns out they had
run out of popcorn and because he knew how much I like popcorn when we go to
the cinema, he had walked to the local Sainsbury’s. Thing is, it was about two
miles away. Ha!
ALAN
It sounds like he really loved you
LUCY
He still does. Tells me every day. Ha!
ALAN
Ok. Enough's enough now. Thank you,
lovely to meet you
LUCY
I love airports you know. There's so
much love here. People arriving and friends welcoming them. Girlfriends saying
goodbye and boyfriends saying hello.
ALAN
And who cares? Honestly how much of
that matters in the end? Ay?
LUCY
What do you mean?
ALAN
Who cares about love? People live and
more importantly, here's the kicker, people die! All the love in the world
doesn't matter when you live your whole life waiting for it to get better,
waiting for a bit of extra cash or a bigger house or a better job and then you
die and no-one cares
LUCY
I think people would care if I died...
ALAN
Oh….that explains everything. You
don't get it do you?
LUCY
Get what?
ALAN
You are dead. You died. This is it.
LUCY
Ay?! No it's not. We're off to
Marbella.
ALAN
I can assure you we're not. And I know
because the last thing I saw was the doctor. I can still feel that pain in my
heart. Oh god, nothing like it. And then black. And then….here.
LUCY
But Charlie has just nipped to the
toilet. He'll be back...
Lucy has stopped bouncing.
LUCY
Oh god I remember now. I saw you, you
were being taken to the operating room. And then Charlie nipped to the toilet
and I closed my eyes for a minute and then...
ALAN
Yep. Marbella
Lucy stands there,
quiet and calm for the first time. Slowly she turns to Alan.
LUCY
Well hey-ho, I had a good run. Let's
see what's...
AIRPORT
GUARD
NEXT!
Two people walk off
stage and Lucy and Alan walk up to the desk
LUCY
So what's this all about then?
ALAN
You know. This is the gate to up
there. The last stop
LUCY
Huh?
ALAN
The lords’ kingdom.
Lucy laughs heartily.
Alan looks angry.
AIRPORT
GUARD
Right a few questions then. Do you
have your passport?
ALAN
Yep
LUCY
Nope! Ha!
AIRPORT
GUARD
Okay thank you. Right and can you just
confirm you haven't got any diseases or illness?
ALAN
Nope.
LUCY
Only disco fever but apparently that's
incurable.
AIRPORT
GUARD
Right ok. And have you lived a life
completely without sin?
ALAN
Always
LUCY
Without sin? Fraid not. This one time,
I spent all night drinking Apple Sours and I had to take a wee behind HMV.
Charlie was not happy.
AIRPORT
GUARD
Okay if you could both just proceed
through here please
LUCY
No i'm going to stay here I think
ALAN
What? Why would you do that? This is
eternal life. It's what everyone wants?!
LUCY
Alan, really! Ask yourself this. If I
don't believe in heaven, and I honestly don't, how come I’m here?
ALAN
I don't know...I just presumed....
LUCY
Maybe it's not leading you to heaven
Alan
ALAN
But it must be. My whole life I’ve
believed I’d get eternity! What else is worth living for?!
LUCY
Alan. Let it go. You lived, you loved.
You shared an umbrella with a beautiful woman and your son made you proud. You
had Lucy. I had Charlie. But Alan, it's over...
ALAN
How can you be so
dismissive? Look at you, you’re just a child
LUCY
Twenty five in two days’ time. Well not
anymore I guess ha! Permanently twenty four. Joan Collins would kill for that.
ALAN
Don’t you want to go back and see that
Charlie again?
LUCY
Alan. Some people can live twenty five
years and experience far more in their life than others who are around for
seventy years. I spent every moment knowing this would happen one day and I
lived the hell out of what I got. I got to meet the love of my life and I made
every day with Charlie count. Do you honestly think I’m not ready now it’s
over?
ALAN
I....I’m..............I'm scared
LUCY
It's ok Alan. It's ok. Come on.
Alan looks scared. Lucy takes his hand
and rubs it. Alan looks at the gate and back to Lucy. Slowly he walks through
the gate and off stage. Lucy watches him go before returning to the back of the
queue. A disgruntled looking old lady walks behind her. Lucy spins around
LUCY
My name's Lucy, what's yours?
The old lady ignores
her. Lucy looks at her, knowingly, and smiles.
LUCY
So I’m waiting for my boyfriend to
come back. He's just nipped to the loo. His name's Charlie and he's gorgeous!
THE
END
