Sunday 11 August 2013

Live, alive, G Live

This page said "draft" on my blog list thingy (technical term, not mine) so I guess I had opened a new page and didn't write anything.

So, in the interests of not wasting electronic paper (I don't know how that works either) here is my script that I presented for the G Live read-through recently. An amazing night, lots of talented writers presented their work, and it all went down really well with the audience.

I'm really proud of this piece. I think it's the first thing i've written with clearly defined characters and I feel like i've learnt an important lesson - write clear characters and your story will fly. Enjoy!




The curtains open and we see a desk with an AIRPORT GUARD behind it. A sign above his head reads "Check-In Desk". A queue of people are slowly being processed and once they have, they walk off stage. LUCY bounces up to the back of the queue, followed moments later by ALAN who stands behind her. She bobs up and down before turning to face Alan, who is clutching his chest.

LUCY
Oh dear are you ok?

Alan ignores her. He takes a deep breath and then stands more comfortably. Lucy continues to bob up and down.
LUCY
So I’m waiting for my boyfriend to come back. He's just nipped to the loo. His name's Charlie and he's gorgeous!

Alan ignores her
LUCY
My name's Lucy, what's yours?

Alan continues to ignore her
LUCY
Yeah Charlie’s great though. We're going to Marbella. Well you know that because so are you! Ha! It's our first holiday together! Can you believe it? I wanted to...

ALAN
It's ALAN and no, i'm sorry but i'm really not interested. I just want to stand here quietly if that's ok.

LUCY
Sure no problem. Sorry!

Lucy turns to face the front again. She tries to contain it but she's clearly excited. Suddenly she faces Alan again.
LUCY
You see, we never really had the money before now. Charlie always says I'm a silly billy but I was only sixteen and I thought charity shops paid people to work there. Trouble is, it only took me a couple of hours and I was hooked. Charlie wasn't too pleased but he always says when he saw how happy I was helping other people, he didn't mind. Anyway he was working at the...

ALAN
I'm sorry but how old are you?

LUCY
I’ll be twenty five in two days’ time. Charlie says we're going to find a nice restaurant and...

ALAN
Twenty five and you talk like you're a small child? Honesty listen to yourself

LUCY
I've never really thought about it like that before. Charlie says...

ALAN
"Charlie says...Charlie says" Where is your beloved Charlie ay? I think your Charlie’s left you my dear.

LUCY
Why? Do you think he's ok? Oh god I hope anything hasn't happened to him on the way to the bathroom. When I first met him, he had hit his head. Well I say he hit his head, technically 'someone' hit his head.

ALAN
Why don't you go and see where he is, if you're so worried and leave me alone

LUCY
You see, Daniel Higgins took my pencil case and made me cry. It was a Hello Kitty one.

ALAN
Hello Kitty? Again how old are you?

LUCY
Twenty five in two days time. No, see I was only twelve and Daniel Higgins took it. I cried all the way home and then just after Newsround finished, there was this knock at the door...

ALAN
Brilliant, honesty i'd just like to stand here...

LUCY
And it was Charlie. He had seen me cry and then he went and stood up to this Daniel Higgins. Trouble is, Charlie isn't the biggest guy. Never has been and Daniel floored him. Thing is...

ALAN
Honesty I...

LUCY
Thing is, Charlie didn't give up fighting. Daniel eventually gave it to him out of pity. And when he turned up at my door I...

ALAN
Annoyed him so much that he was forced to date you?

LUCY
No silly. No when he turned up at my door I made him a cup of tea. Best cup of tea he ever had he said. And hobnobs!

ALAN
Lucky boy

LUCY
And we haven't really been apart since. Well I went to uni and he went to a different one but every weekend I saw him and now here we are. First holiday!

ALAN
Do you make a habit of pestering strangers?

LUCY
Sometimes. So who are you here with?

ALAN
No-one. Is that ok?

LUCY
I don't know really. Do you think it's ok?

ALAN
What do you care what I think?

LUCY
I think you're interesting. I feel like I know you

ALAN
I don't think so.

LUCY
Yeah no I definitely know you. Did you ever teach at Oak Hill?
ALAN
Nope

LUCY
Hmmmm….
Lucy turns to face the front and Alan resumes standing there, moping. Suddenly Lucy spins around

LUCY
I KNOW!  You were at the same hospital as me weren't you

ALAN
Was I?

LUCY
Yep I saw you. Hanging about outside my room. Not in a weird way. Well I don't think so. Anyway that day was amazing. Not only did I find out that err well whatever it was I had, had gone into remission, but my dad bought us lunch and we played crazy golf by the beach. Dad so cheated on the Big Windmill and I...

ALAN
You were at St Andrews?

LUCY
Was I?! Only for like the whole of last year. Yeah basically test and test and test and test and test and...

ALAN
Test?

LUCY
Yes! And then they did stuff and it backed off. Typical. As Dad said, nothing can stand up to any Wilson woman that stands their ground!

ALAN
Wonderful...

LUCY
So where's your wife?

ALAN
She died.

LUCY
Oh i'm sorry.

ALAN
Why? You didn't run her down

LUCY
No but it's what people say isn't it. That's what people said to me when I got ill. "I'm sorry". Weird isn't it. How did you meet?

ALAN
We were at the same bus stop and when it started raining she shared her umbrella with me. Her name was Lucy.

LUCY
Like me?! No way! Aww. She sounds like me. I like helping other people. Makes you feel good doesn’t it. Do you have any children?

ALAN
One. A boy. Well man now. Is that alright?!

LUCY
What's his name?

ALAN
Mark. Why?

LUCY
Just making conversation. You know, to pass the time.

AIRPORT GUARD
NEXT!
The queue moves forward and the two people get processed. Lucy and Alan are next

LUCY
Oh I hope Charlie is ok. Honestly that boy would lose his head if it wasn't screwed on. Which is weird because i've never seen any screws on anyone but yet everyone always says that and...

ALAN
Thank god, nearly there

LUCY
So where's Mark then?

ALAN
If I answer will you leave me alone?!

LUCY
Hmmm. Maybe.

ALAN
I don't talk to him.

LUCY
Really? Then how do you tell him his dinner's ready?

ALAN
He doesn't live with me

LUCY
Oh dear. Why's that then?

ALAN
Is it any of your business?

LUCY
Did he keep annoying you?

ALAN
You could say that. If you want to know, he nearly bankrupt me

LUCY
Oh dear.......can't have done it that badly, you're off to Marbella!

ALAN
No but nearly. Him and that stupid garage of his. You watch one episode of Dragons Den and you think you can run your own company?! But that’s ok as long as daddy dearest is there to pick up the bill

LUCY
What do you do?

ALAN
I'm a mechanic.

LUCY
Oh. So he just wanted to be like his dad then?

ALAN
If he had wanted to be like his dad, he would have been more sensible with his money. Saved it for a rainy day.

LUCY
Maybe he just wanted to make you proud?

ALAN
Sorry what is this to do with you anyway?

LUCY
Nothing but Charlie's taking his time. This one time when we went to see Mrs Doubtfire he went to get popcorn. Honestly I swear half the film was over before he returned. Turns out they had run out of popcorn and because he knew how much I like popcorn when we go to the cinema, he had walked to the local Sainsbury’s. Thing is, it was about two miles away. Ha!

ALAN
It sounds like he really loved you

LUCY
He still does. Tells me every day. Ha!

ALAN
Ok. Enough's enough now. Thank you, lovely to meet you 

LUCY
I love airports you know. There's so much love here. People arriving and friends welcoming them. Girlfriends saying goodbye and boyfriends saying hello.

ALAN
And who cares? Honestly how much of that matters in the end? Ay?

LUCY
What do you mean?

ALAN
Who cares about love? People live and more importantly, here's the kicker, people die! All the love in the world doesn't matter when you live your whole life waiting for it to get better, waiting for a bit of extra cash or a bigger house or a better job and then you die and no-one cares

LUCY
I think people would care if I died...

ALAN
Oh….that explains everything. You don't get it do you?

LUCY
Get what?

ALAN
You are dead. You died. This is it.

LUCY
Ay?! No it's not. We're off to Marbella.

ALAN
I can assure you we're not. And I know because the last thing I saw was the doctor. I can still feel that pain in my heart. Oh god, nothing like it. And then black. And then….here.

LUCY
But Charlie has just nipped to the toilet. He'll be back...

Lucy has stopped bouncing.

LUCY
Oh god I remember now. I saw you, you were being taken to the operating room. And then Charlie nipped to the toilet and I closed my eyes for a minute and then...

ALAN
Yep. Marbella

Lucy stands there, quiet and calm for the first time. Slowly she turns to Alan.

LUCY
Well hey-ho, I had a good run. Let's see what's...

AIRPORT GUARD
NEXT!

Two people walk off stage and Lucy and Alan walk up to the desk

LUCY
So what's this all about then?

ALAN
You know. This is the gate to up there. The last stop

LUCY
Huh?

ALAN
The lords’ kingdom.
Lucy laughs heartily. Alan looks angry.

AIRPORT GUARD
Right a few questions then. Do you have your passport?

ALAN
Yep

LUCY
Nope! Ha!

AIRPORT GUARD
Okay thank you. Right and can you just confirm you haven't got any diseases or illness?

ALAN
Nope.

LUCY
Only disco fever but apparently that's incurable.

AIRPORT GUARD
Right ok. And have you lived a life completely without sin?

ALAN
Always

LUCY
Without sin? Fraid not. This one time, I spent all night drinking Apple Sours and I had to take a wee behind HMV. Charlie was not happy.

AIRPORT GUARD
Okay if you could both just proceed through here please

LUCY
No i'm going to stay here I think

ALAN
What? Why would you do that? This is eternal life. It's what everyone wants?!

LUCY
Alan, really! Ask yourself this. If I don't believe in heaven, and I honestly don't, how come I’m here?

ALAN
I don't know...I just presumed....

LUCY
Maybe it's not leading you to heaven Alan

ALAN
But it must be. My whole life I’ve believed I’d get eternity! What else is worth living for?!

LUCY
Alan. Let it go. You lived, you loved. You shared an umbrella with a beautiful woman and your son made you proud. You had Lucy. I had Charlie. But Alan, it's over...

ALAN
How can you be so dismissive? Look at you, you’re just a child

LUCY
Twenty five in two days’ time. Well not anymore I guess ha! Permanently twenty four. Joan Collins would kill for that.
ALAN
Don’t you want to go back and see that Charlie again?

LUCY
Alan. Some people can live twenty five years and experience far more in their life than others who are around for seventy years. I spent every moment knowing this would happen one day and I lived the hell out of what I got. I got to meet the love of my life and I made every day with Charlie count. Do you honestly think I’m not ready now it’s over?

ALAN
I....I’m..............I'm scared

LUCY
It's ok Alan. It's ok. Come on.

Alan looks scared. Lucy takes his hand and rubs it. Alan looks at the gate and back to Lucy. Slowly he walks through the gate and off stage. Lucy watches him go before returning to the back of the queue. A disgruntled looking old lady walks behind her. Lucy spins around

LUCY
My name's Lucy, what's yours?

The old lady ignores her. Lucy looks at her, knowingly, and smiles.

LUCY
So I’m waiting for my boyfriend to come back. He's just nipped to the loo. His name's Charlie and he's gorgeous!


THE END

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